I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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