But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
