I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
He did a backflip because drugs
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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