She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
I want to fling myself into the sun
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Randomize
