I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
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