More tranny stories later!
apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
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