Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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