Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
Randomize