I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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