Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
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