new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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