I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Randomize
