can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
