Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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