i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
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