you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
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