He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
drinking out of a sandbucket again
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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