dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Randomize
