Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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