I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
