Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
