i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Randomize
