I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
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