I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
Randomize
