I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
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