did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
