I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Randomize
