Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
