U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize
