dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Randomize
