He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Randomize