genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
