In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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