I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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