Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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