You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
