Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Randomize
