do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
Randomize
