My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
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