Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
