Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
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