i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
