Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
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