he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
