I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
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