is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
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