We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
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