OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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