8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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