Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
